13 May Bye bye Tim Stüttgen
On Sunday I woke up very early as the birds were singing loud and I was freezing cold. I closed my window and looked for an extra blanket. I had been dreaming of a sad man I did not know. He was ill, with lost gaze, his soul gone. It was a horrible nightmare.
Later in the day I got the news. The birds were singing goodbye to him and the cold was the cold of death. My very good and dearest friend Tim had died. He was one of the most intelligent people I have ever met. He was a true genius.
You sent me an email on Saturday evening. You did not leave me time to answer. How are you Maria? I am fine Tim, I am 17 weeks pregnant and back in my house by the beach, we were here together some years ago, remember? You can come here if you wish to have a break, of course. I am so sad that you are not feeling very good at the moment and I am so sad that you decided to leave already.
I loved meeting you.
I went to the sea and by looking at the waves I calmed down. I felt that you were not gone, that nothing is ever over, because the waves come back all over again. I do not know very well what I felt, but it was reassuring. I hope you found the peace you were looking for and that we meet again soon.
Please look after my baby in the meantime. When we saw each other last time in Berlin I was one week pregnant and I did not know. It was great having dinner with you. Thanks for coming to my presentation on subversive maternities. I love you Tim and I will always do. Bye bye my dear friend.